Welcome to EH-Net.

No, you don't have to use the official courseware if you don't want to. There are a couple of other books available about the same subjects. You may browse through the forums to find some of them (eg CEH Certified Ethical Hacker Study Guide, Certified Ethical Hacker Exam Prep, Certified Ethical Hacker Review Guide, etc.). I wrote some time ago a short review on EC-Council's iClass, maybe you find some useful info there as well.
How long one has to prepare for an exam in order to pass really depends on each individual, so it's hard to answer your last question in a general way.

 

HI missile.  The only way to be able to sit for the exam is to get "permission" from EC-Council.. Either you buy / train with what and where they approve, allowing you to sit for the CEH Exam 312-50.

Or, prove at least two years of experience in a written letter from a current or previous employer.  This assumes that you self study (it doesn't count if you use their course material, but can't prove you didn't pay for it: torrent etc.).
Then they either sell you the voucher themselves or give you a code to register through Prometric or VUE, to sit for CEH Exam  EC0-350.

There is no difference in the end result of exam (as they are the same), per their site:
What is the difference between Exam 312-50 and Exam EC0-350?
EC-Council offers the Certified Ethical Hacker examination over two channels – the EC-Council Accredited Training Center (ATC) and the Authorized Prometric Testing Center (APTC). Only students who undergo training for CEH at any ATC are eligible to appear for the web based Prometric Prime exam (Exam 312-50).


Students who opt to pursue self study can appear for the exam EC0-350 at the Authorized Prometric Testing Center after they fulfill the examination eligibility criteria and produce the voucher number to Prometric.


In all other aspects the exams are identical in source and lead to the certification ‘Certified Ethical Hacker’.

I have emailed them and called them several times, sent them all the information and application neccessary to sit for the EC0-350, but they don't seem to respond (or take their sweet time).

I sent all my certification copies, experience, a written letter from 2 years of specific consulting I did (written and signed by ex-customer), including copy of drivers license etc.. All as requested, but nothing.. Been what seems a couple of weeks now..

Anyways that the skinny on my personal experience and info..

Hey SephStorm, thanks for the offer, if you think you have some pull that would be great, anything to expedite the process.. I mean it's like I'm the one giving them money, so don't know what they hold up is...

I have been in personal contact with a sales rep from their Albuquerque office Rebecca Baca (when I call and ask who to speak to she's the contact I got), but after several email and phone calls it seems nothing's happened, don't know if there's some special waiting verification period or what.. Let me know how you could help, I'm gonna try again tomorrow anyways.